You Graduated! Now What? By, Alyssa Calderon

You Graduated! Now What? By, Alyssa Calderon 

Most students look forward to seeing their academic career come to an end. You work hard, lose hours of sleep, create lasting memories, and while crossing the finish line is exciting, it can also feel overwhelming. Now more than ever, graduates are bombarded with questions from peers and family members about their career plans after graduation. These questions and expectations can bring about feelings of stress, anxiety, sadness, and other conflicting emotions.

When faced with tough decisions like moving, employment, or finances, we may feel compelled to avoid social gatherings. Some time alone can help you regroup and reflect, but be sure not to isolate yourself for too long. This is a time where many of your peers may be facing similar transitions. Creating a community with friends in mirroring positions can help normalize your experience, and provide you, and them, with a sense of support.

Social media is another outlet that can dampen your post-graduate experience. Being flooded with pictures and posts about others’ success can encourage comparison and possibly create more pressure to meet someone else’s standards. Fortunately, there are some activities you can incorporate into your life now, that can shift the attention back to you and your needs.

• Exercise! Moving your body is always a great way to connect with yourself and improve your mood.
• Practice mindfulness or yoga. Even a simple breathing exercise can help keep you in the present when everyone is pushing you towards the future.
• Take up a hobby! If you have just finished years of schooling, it might be useful to tap into interests you did not have time for before.
• Journaling is a great way to process your thoughts and emotions during this time.
• Plan productivity! You do not have to spend every waking moment job searching. Designating specific days and time frames to work can help you be proactive and feel accomplished.

Post-graduation emotions can be overpowering, but that does not have to be the entirety of your experience. Practicing some of the activities above, or discussing these challenges with a licensed therapist, can help you feel more grounded and ease you into navigating this new chapter in life.

How appreciating difference makes you a better therapist

How appreciating difference makes you a better therapist

By, Ashley Longsworth 

Clients come in in all shapes and forms. This diverse population of race, socioeconomic status, life spans, gender and sexual identities allow for therapists to step out of assumptions and be curious.

It is inevitable that therapists and clients will differ in some way. By choosing to ignore differences, therapists may lose the opportunity to join with their clients.

Appreciating differences is beneficial for therapists. Here are some ways in which appreciating differences can make you a better therapist.

·         It allows you to be curious – Stories make sense in context! Acknowledging differences in the therapy room allows for therapists to mindful of the therapeutic relationship and how the differences between them and the client may shape the therapeutic process.

·         Humanizes you- Differences can lead to discomfort. By approaching your own discomfort with curiosity it allows you to look at the relationship with your client differences and see it from a different perspective.

What other ways do you think appreciating differences in the therapy room can help make better therapists?

5 Tips to Help You Get Through the Marriage and Family Therapy Program

5 Tips to Help You Get Through the Marriage and Family Therapy Program

By: Lyrica Solomon, MS

Not sure if you are cut out for the Marriage and Family Therapy Program? Well, I wasn't either. I was a lot skeptical about taking that leap of faith with my education. Getting my Bachelor's degree seemed like a "walk in the park", but what if graduate school challenged me and I couldn't rise to the occasion? Well, I wasn't completely right in my skepticism's. I am now a graduate of this program and these are the five most helpful things that helped me along the way.

Be sensitive/gentle. Graduate school can be a different experience from the typical schooling that you are used to. Some people adjust without a problem, some people struggle a little, and some people struggle a lot. Through it all, be gentle with yourself and sensitive to those around you because they are in the same boat as you.

Self-care. How can I help someone if I am not, first, taking care of myself. Not just specific to helping professions, but self-care is super important. Find activities, places, people, regimens, etc. that help you to stay grounded in who you are.

Stay connected. Thinking social media here? Not exactly. I can't emphasize how helpful it was for me to cultivate relationships with those around me. It was very comforting to be able to share my experiences with people who were struggling just like me.

Make mistakes. "The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing" -- John Powell

John Powell is simply stating that we learn from our mistakes. So, don't be afraid to make mistakes because these are perfect opportunities for growth.

Practice. Yes, practice still makes perfect (even in graduate school). Practice what interests you within the field of MFT, and know that, with lots of practice, you will begin to find your niche.

So, what will be your story once you complete this program?

The Hidden Answer

The Hidden Answer

By, Allison McFatter

One significant theme of therapy is recognizing and understanding a client’s ‘answer’, or how the client has adapted to a problem. In understanding what influenced the client to respond to a problem as he/she did, the therapist can better understand how the client has learned to cope with challenges, and why the coping technique makes sense to the client. In understanding the client’s perspective, therapy can then aim to find a positive solution to the original problem – the problem that led to the ‘answer’ in the first place.

Let’s say that someone comes to therapy to quit drinking. The drinking might be assumed to be the problem, but would quitting really be the end-all solution? What would happen when alcohol is taken away?

Drinking is often a coping method (the answer) to deal with an underlying problem. Taking alcohol away without addressing the original problem that led to the drinking will leave the client stranded in the same predicament, but now their learned coping method is forbidden.

Therapy that does not take into account the multi-layers in human behavior misses how drinking might play an adaptive role in the client’s life. The alcohol, while causing problems in itself, is being utilized as a tool to solve an underlying problem. If therapy focused on the underlying problem, the need for alcohol would dissolve once the original problem was no longer an issue.

Further thought: What do you think informs the creation of a person’s ‘answer’?

If you found this concept interesting, check out the following for more!

·                     Aesthetics of change by Keeney

·                     Change: Principles of Problem Formation and Problem Resolution by Watzlawick,        Weakland, & Fisch

Understanding First Generation: LatinX

Understanding First Generation: LatinX

From a young age, it is common for children of immigrants to have a clear understanding of the hopes one’s parents may have for him or her: to achieve the American Dream. This often includes attending a good college, obtaining a white-collar job, marrying young, and starting a family. The stories and traditions of their parents’ home country are incorporated within the home and in day-to-day life. From the day first generation babies are born, they are set apart from their friends who have American-born parents. 

Oftentimes, certain fears and pressures are enmeshed within the hope that these parents have for their children:

➔      Pressure to marry and to do it young. Women are expected to marry young and to immediately begin having children. Independence and moving out of the home are seen as unnecessary and considered dangerous.

➔      Fear of pursuing a preferred career path. The expectations to pursue a white-collar occupation are oftentimes considered the only option. A teacher, for example, is viewed as an inferior profession, and choosing this path can be seen as dishonorable.

➔      Fear to disappoint. The expectation for children to supersede their parents educationally can add additional pressure to school and academic settings. From a young age, children are made aware of the sacrifices their parents made in order to give their children better lives. Not making an “acceptable” career choice can be considered a disappointment or a failure.

How can first generation LatinX individuals value parental expectations while also holding individual desires and dreams?